Forney’s sister died and he has gone to Maine to bury her in the family plot. And now he is back and I am scared to call him. But, because I’m crazy I did called him and told him that I would come over to see him. When I got there and he answered the door he smelled delightful and sweet. I asked him if he was sure that it was okay to be here this late and of course without hesitation he said it was fine. He started to ask me how I was while he was gone and if everything with Americus is alright. And everything was fine and swell. I told him how Americus was going to be Annie Oakley in the Western Days Parade on Saturday and he enjoyed that information. Then he said that he had bought her a book and that reminded him of the library and he started to ask questions about the library. I told him that Retha, the mayor’s daughter, was going to be the new librarian but Forney wasn’t surprised.
As we started talking and getting into conversations we got on the topic of us and I told him that he should follow his dream and become a teacher. Little did I know that he wanted me and Americus and that’s it. he loved us and wanted to be with us and nothing else. But I didn’t want to be the person to hold him back of everything he could do with his life. So when he told me that he was in love with me I did not respond. Then he asked me if I cared about him at all and I said yes as a friend. I knew that if I kept on thinking about him and me and that night we spent together that I would not be able to lie to him and I would tell him the truth and say that I love him with all my heart. But he kept insisting that I tell him whether or not I love him and finally he asked me …Novalee… DO YOU LOVE ME? And I looked at him and said I do love you but not in the way in which you should be loved. Saying that to him killed me inside. I didn’t want to break his heart or mine even but, I felt like it had to be done so that Forney could finally leave this place and live his life the way he had always wanted to….free.
Pgs. 322-326
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